Yard Sale Style: Key West or Bust

Every year Chop and I have at least one massive yard sale. We're addicts. Completely and totally hooked. For years I'd been doing yard sales with my mom, and the first year Chop and I were together I suggested the same tradition. He snorted. Yard sale? Ha! He has since learned the wisdom of clearing the clutter and cashing in on the serenity of a clutter-free home.

Doink! Did I say "clutter-free"?

The funny thing is that we've now had at least four or five yard sales since we've been married, and we still seem to have more crap around this house than Santa Clause. I'm not sure how the physics works, but one would typically expect to find less stuff after a good, cleansing sale than more, but it seems that our house just keeps growing to accommodate more stuff. Not sure how that happens. Regardless, this yard sale is very different. The vibe has changed. This yard sale is all about "letting go" ... and moving to Key West! And tomorrow we're back at it.

So, the first to go? Wool anything. Wool blankets, wool coats, wool scarves and hats. We have one winter left here in Virginia, and we can survive without wool. Funny thing is that I never wear it anyway. Too scratchy. Don't we all know that already? The idea that I keep hanging on to that "great" wool turtleneck is just comical. Really. Not to mention that it's a turtleneck.

Next on the list? The second of any double of anything. The second hand mixer, the second blender, the second set of everyday flatware that we always thought we'd need but have never used once. I'll keep the second set of bakeware because I actually do bake, but the fifth, sixth, and seventh cookie sheet ... really? Oh, and the fondue maker! I don't have a second one of those. I also don't need the first one. I always dreamed of a lovely gruyere and fruit ensemble that still hasn't happened in five years. Bye, bye fondue maker. Funny that none of the barware is making the cut list. One can always use 12 martini glasses, two dozen wine glasses and three bottle openers. My family is Slovak after all. And we're moving to Key West where we expect lots of company.

Speaking of company, however, reminds me of space. There is none. We'll be moving to a tiny, two-bedroom home in paradise. When you come to visit, we might ask you to bring your own pillows, but we'll have fresh limes and pretty margarita pitchers to make up for it! The limited space is certainly a driving force in our decision-making process. If we're going to live a simpler lifestyle, then it's time to spine up and let it go. This is round one, mind you. The practice round. I'm trying to be graceful about giving up my nine bottles of red nail polish. It's a painful process, but I'm sure I'll be a stronger person in the end.

Simply put, as we snoop around our home looking for gidgets and gadgets for our driveway inventory, we ask ourselves two questions. One. Do we need really this in Key West? Eh, probably not. Two. Will this fit our Key West lifestyle? The moose figure? No? Sayonara moose. The family heirlooms? Priceless, of course. Some things will be with us always. Tomorrow morning, we'll be outside at 5:30 am trying to beat the early birds to our own driveway. Let's hope that sweet little moose finds a loving new home. I'm trading him in for a parrot.